Chapter 14: Why I Am Disappointed
When Clint got home, it was nearly 11 pm. Selene was still sitting on the couch, watching TV. The only light in the room was that coming from the TV, which shined dimly on Selene’s face, giving her an eerie look.
“Why did you leave the ball early? Did you find it boring?” Clint asked her.
“Yes.” Selene could smell the alcohol on his breath and frown.
“If you found it boring, you could’ve joined me.”
“You seemed very busy,” Selene answered briefly.
Clint kept silent for a while, then went and sat down next to her on the couch. “Selene, I think we need to talk.”
Finally, Selene turned to look at him and then asked. “What do we need to talk about?” Her face was devoid of emotion, almost like a puppet.
“Jennifer is like a sister to me. We grew up together. I didn’t introduce you to her at the party because I didn’t think it was the right time.”
Selene listened intently, then laughed. “You don’t owe me an explanation, Clint. We both know that we didn’t get married because we love each other, but because of that one-night stand. I’m sure you hold me responsible for it because you were drunk that night.”
Selene pushed a bang of hair away from her face. ”But you didn’t get angry. Instead, you chose to use this opportunity to get married, even though, in this day and age, one-night stands are very common.”
“What do you mean?” Clint frowned.Exclusive content © by Nô(v)el/Dr/ama.Org.
Selene smiled again, slightly. ”You probably get a lot of stress from work, and age-wise it’s time for you to get married. But you don’t have time to manage a relationship; having a one-night stand with me was the perfect opportunity to skip that stage and jump straight to marriage. You don’t tell others about it because you worry it may not last for long.”
Clint’s facial expression remained unchanged. Maybe something was brewing up in his mind, or perhaps he was forbearing himself from saying the wrong thing. “What about you? Why did you say ‘yes’ when I asked you to marry me?”
“I’m not holding any secrets. You’ve seen my ex-boyfriend before and know about the fight between Jennifer and me. Your ‘sister’ and I have been fighting since college, and she stole my ex-boyfriend before our one-night stand happened. I knew, by coincidence, that you were my ex’s boss, but I also married you because it’s high time for me to get married, and I don’t have time for managing relationships.”
Selene paused for a moment, then continued. ”I thought this would be a good way to hit two birds with one stone. Besides, I’m only human; I had no reason to decline a marriage proposal from a handsome and rich man.”
“Please tell me the real reason for it,” Clint said, maintaining a calm tone.
“It doesn’t matter if I tell you the truth. Maybe we both did it for the same reason. What you want is an easy, stress-free marriage and an undemanding partner. So do I.” Selene said.
She sighed. ”You just explained to me the relationship between you and Jennifer, and I’m afraid that you may think of me as trouble, so I just want to explain to you my attitude about this marriage.”
“Are you saying that we should just treat each other like strangers and not interfere with each other much?” Clint asked with a light smile.
“I think we’ve been like that since we got married. And it seems to be working, doesn’t it? If we get to a point in a few months where we think this marriage has a long future, we could let others know about our relationship and maybe talk about kids. What do you think?”
Clint curled his lips and smiled. “Sounds great. We are very honest about our marriage, and I think it’s a great idea.” He then held out his hand. “For a good marriage!”
Selene did not shake his hand but indifferently nodded her head.
She had never talked so much with Clint before. She did not talk much in her daily life. It took a lot of effort to do it.
But to her puzzlement, she did not feel relieved when she finished her speech. And seeing Clint’s uncaring expression, she also felt unknowingly disappointed.
Why am I disappointed? I shouldn’t have any expectations for this marriage! Selene thought to herself.
After this conversation, they interacted with each other less and less, even though they lived in the same apartment. Most of the time, Clint got home very late. The few times he came back early, he chose to work alone in his study.
In all, they never went to sleep together.
They didn’t even say much to each other.
Selene was unwilling to get intimate with others. She should have been happy with this ‘non-interfering’ marriage arrangement, but now that she had experienced it, she realized that maybe it was not what she really wanted.
This was especially apparent to her when she realized that they had not made love for nearly a month after that day.
****
The light was still on in Clint’s study.
Selene looked at the clock on the wall; it was early in the morning.
She pushed the door of his study open and saw Clint asleep on his desk.
She frowned and was about to wake him up. However, she stopped herself after noticing several parenting books on his desk. Feeling a little surprised, she took back her hand but touched the mouse beside the computer. There was a single folder on the screen titled “HER.”
Before Selene could regain her composure, Clint woke up, rubbed his eyes, and looked up at her. Seeing Selene staring at his computer screen, he silently moved the mouse and turned off the computer.
“What’s wrong?” Clint asked.
“I noticed that the light was still on, so I came to see you,” Selene replied.
“We have agreed to leave each other to our own business. I hope you have a good reason for coming here.”